Alyssa: Did you ever go to a family picnic day? With the pie eating contest?

Me: No, I never saw one of those.

Alyssa: Oh! It's so funny, they put their hands back here and then there's all this cream and they put their face in it and go like this (pie scarfing motion)

Me: Have you ever seen a hotdog eating contest?

Alyssa: No.

Me: Well, they have this big plate of hot dogs and buns and the people take 3 or 4 at a time and stuff their faces.

Alyssa: Yeah, well they said the winner of the pies gets a madagascar basketball and this boy Robbie won the basketball.

Me: The winner of the hot dog contest gets a lot of money. And a belt, I think. They're hot dog eating champion of the world.

Alyssa: Who won it?

Me: Oh, I don't know. Some little Japanese man.

HOME

I'm at home. Non-internet activities will exceed internet activities. Please Understand.

Family Ties

I've commuted back and forth from Jersey City too many times. Going home is very welcome - even if it is three days later than I expected.

These few days I have enjoyed the time that I've been able to spend with my family. I barely see them all at once, so it's great to observe the crazy in its normal, 100% concentrated form. Today on the way to visit my grandmother and great aunt at the senior center my mom coughed in the car. People cough all the time, right? Oh... no, they don't. She looked at me and said, "I think I have the Hanta Virus." As my mom, my grandmother and I were eating and chatting over lunch, my grandmother let it slip (or rather stressed) what she thinks of Angelina Jolie and her mother. "Them Obeah!"

By the way, an Obeah is a voodoo witch.

Excellence At Its Best

And on the 8th day the Lord said unto Adrienne: "Go forth and ye shall receive some Followill Lovin', and this lovin' will be good." And so it was. And it was good.

i.e. - The music was incredible. Quitting his 2 pack a day habit was the best thing Caleb has ever done for his voice and today it sounded better than I could have imagined.

My cousin Alyssa is six now. Being 13 years apart, I used to find her really annoying, but now she's actually getting pretty cool. She's going to the same camp I went to when I was her age, and she even has some of the same counselors. She's doing the same activities and learning the same songs; we even sang together today. "Hello Goodbye" by the Beatles. We have good taste.

Kings of Leon has this minitour thing going on right now and they're stopping in New York on Monday. I checked craigslist to see if people were selling or asking for tickets because I wanted to see if it sold out.. and guess what? It did.

But guess what else? I got a ticket! I purchased it from the devil ticketmaster before it sold out (of course). I was debating buying a ticket and going alone, but then it occurred to me that I have missed far too many Followill-lovin' opportunities. Yes, it sucks that I have to see them in Roseland instead of the many times I missed them (stupidly) at places like the Bowery and Little Brother's. (Little Brothers! I mean come on!) But it should be cool. If by some fluke someone who's reading this will be there - watch for me! I'll be close to the front and doing a maniacal baptist dance. That's right, baptist dance. Something about that Followill music makes me want to shake my hands and gyrate like the spirit of the lord is within me!

So, that's what I'll be doing on monday.

Wow. This guy just took a shower and I can smell his cologne through my door. My perfectly closed and locked door. That's not a good sign.

Over cologne-age is a pretty common college guy problem, especially with all these new lady-attracting sprays going around. Really though, hasn't anyone heard of pheromones? Guys, if you're supposed/hoping to attract that certain female for mating, she'll smell you better if you where less cologne. Plus, everyone will like you more. It's a win-win situation.

WATCH THIS

Watch this.
That's all.